Hey MJ - I love Michael J Fox and I've seen this movie. It was quite good and funny in places. Good pick-up.


Nuggetin0 - You're right. I did contradict myself a little here. Leaving out the part that I was most intrigued by. hehe. Whoops.

Sacrificing too much of the story to fit into a one or two sentence logline is everybodies 'beef' when it comes to writing one. But it's required.... so you need to REALLY think about what the story is about. The overall main story. What is it that you're trying to tell or say. Every story is different but my main thinking here is: A____ must____ in order to____ (and can then include) but then____. This differs with every story but it's a good example to start off with and then see what you end up with.

The reason why I left the Ghost part out was because it seems your logline involves two subjects. Ah... I mean... when I'm trying to write a logline I think of = Who is the story about, what is their struggle/obstacle and then prevailance. I'm thinking that your story is about the Ghost Whisperer not the Ghost. (This is where I'd read the synopsis and then be intrigued by the time travel - and then pick it up to watch...) Meaning, the scenes involving the Ghost's murders would only be a small part, the rest being the Ghost Whisperer's findings, struggles and obstacles, then to the outcome of how he solves it. I'm thinking that the main point here is his extravagent decision of what he does to solve this. It's what I'm thinking when I read your logline...... dunno!!!

Wow - you have a producer looking at it. How cool. I hope you go well. Please let me know how you go. I'd love to know - and then watch it. It sounds like a good story. Good on you and keep up the good work.

Penelope.

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-Read a script to anyone of the latest spoof movies to be released. meet the spartans, scary movie, epic movie etc.

Hey Persnicket,

This is very well and true to read latest spoofs or current releases or movies. It's a good idea. But sometimes this just isn't enough advice. Sometimes I might want more of a discussion about what I want to know. Or maybe I'm confused by something - eg. the same type of movies having different types of loglines or synopsiseseseses.

A chat about things can often be the answer that I'm looking for. It may be just those one or two words that makes me realise what I AM looking for -or- makes me realise what I'm doing or thinking incorrectly.

A logline or synopsis can have so many different responses from different types of people. So by putting all the advice together and coming up with the best of all the comments can sometimes be the way to get the best out of what I'm trying to do.

This is the same with feedback. Telling people my story can give me all the replies in the world. But it's the same or the similar ones that I pay attention to. If so many think or believe the same thing - then maybe it's good advice.

It's easy to read other's loglines. We all do that. But sometimes it's not enough. And if I believe I'm writing something that is really different, a chat can always help.

Penelope.

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Thanks Penelope...that advice about loglines should prove useful.

And don't worry, if I get good news from this producer I'll be telling everybody!

For what is worth, as a newcomer to this forum, to this community, I am to present you here my own allegedly BAD playwright (notice: NOT screenplay!). But first, I'd like to point out that the story with the clown is NICE; not bad, nor extraordinary, but... nice. Its message is a strong one, but the technicality of the text is a lousy one. It resembles, actually, more with an 'Outer Limits' or 'The Twilight Zone' series episode. It all ends in suspense, which is good.
The bread is the symbol for children, obviously, but the names... are hilarious. :-P For instance, you can make a single (i.e., complex, granted) name out of Helmut, Gustav and Schmidt. :-)) Not to mention the everlasting FRITZ(!) of the Germans. Or Ada... :-P
Now returning and not taking into account all that... too much :-) I am to present you here my own play for a would-be novel, henceforth. The problem with this one is that I have NO experience in writing novels, nor great catch to the would-be public reader of mine, as it clearly shows. In fact, Romanians are getting tired of hard Sci-Fi, unfortunately, as foreigners do. Everyone prefers the URBAN fantasy type of stories, not even the heroic one(!) 'Lord of the Rings' is a goner too, I'm afraid. :-) So, what could a mere, old-styled would-be writer do to change their hearts? Not much, I'm afraid.
Anyway, here goes... nothing. :-) The basic idea of this would-be novel is that my hero falls in love with an anti-heroine, they both travel through time merely by concentrating hard enough until it becomes a second nature to them, as exponents of a new kind of Human (and more) breed. Eventually, they are both hunted down. Everything "ends" in complete suspense, raising great questions of existentialism for mankind... and more from this galaxy, but not limited to. :-)
It's, basically, a non-linear patterned would-be novel, and I DON'T KNOW how to swap the narrative patterns between them, in order to make it (i.e., the story) plausible enough to be read... non-linearly(!) :-(
For instance, just so to give you a hint of what I'm typing about :-P the main character, as well as the anti-heroine, which is to advance considerably, by concentrating and transporting himself back and forth through time, narrates his thoughts with absolutely NO relevance whatsoever to the previous frame's context(!) However, we can still put the pieces of the puzzle together and find him, as well as her. We find them both on the atemporal stream.
More than that, they do not recall anything of their prev. actions, but they DO KNOW that they have some sort of special mission... somewhere, SOMEHOW. It may turn out, still, not to be about a place, but about the "HOW?"; a question on everyone's lips. Or, what's even more important, is the question: "WHAT is The Mission?! YOUR (i.e., the two heroes') mission!"
These are difficult concepts to translate into a novel, as actual working frames, and I could sincerely use ANY type of input here... Also, I'd need some sort of glimmer of hope into what the feasibility of my story is concerned.

Q. Is my Am. En. THAT bad?(!) :-(

P.S. I haven't got my BA in Literature and Grammar yet, but I've practiced for long ever since I was needed to halt my university studies.


Thank you SO much(!)..

~ S. M. ~

Hey Penelope,

I've been reading your posts in other threads and you seem very knowledgeable...

Where are you from in Australia? I'm from Brisbane .

If you were from Brisbane too, I would be interested in meeting up to discuss the possibility of writing a script together. ( I haven't done this of yet and want to know how well it can work so I can start to think about whether I want a writing partner).

Hey There Nuggetin0,

Thank you very much - and thanks for reading. Oh... shucks. It's why I post, I suppose. I'm just glad that someone is happy to read and chat.

You know, I spent about 10 years in Brisbane. I loved it there. Actually I've loved it everywhere in this country. So there you go.

I'd like to chat a bit more though, about your interest in writing something? It seems I can't contact you through this forum other than posting. Would you be willing to post your email address? I will then chat all about it if you like. Then you can delete it from the post. I'm not willing enough to post mine. It's too personal of an address. I'll keep my eyes peeled for ya.

Penelope.

Thanks Nuggetin0,

I'm onto it...

Penelope.

Hey Nuggetin0...

I'm not ignoring you. Busy, busy, busy. It's end of month and this time is the worst for a bookkeeper. Bear with me - I'll let you know.

Thanks heaps for it, though.

Penelope.

Can anyone point me in the direction of a REALLY GOOD horror screenplay? (It doesn't have to be a good movie necessarily; I'm looking for a GOOD screenplay.)

Suggestions?

Is the screenplay to Alien any good?

Hey Tuffe.

Yes. I believe Alien is a great screenplay. Read it and see what you think.

Penelope.

No worries, Penelope.

Hey there Nuggetin0,

Well what can I say. I knew I was going to like this. I had this feeling just from the logline you posted. But I LOVE it. It was very good. By the time I found a moment to pick it up - I just couldn't put it down. It was a great read, very visual and straightforward. It's got that something - you know when you watch a movie and it vividly stays with you for a couple days, well it happening.

Good on ya. I hope you do well with it - and most of all, keep it up.

I'll also email you with a few more comments...

Penelope.

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I saw "Run Fat Boy Run" two nights ago and was AGAIN impressed by Simon Pegg's writing skill. (It was co-written by comedian Michael Ian Black.) It's a very funny movie. And, like "Shaun of the Dead" and "Hot Fuzz", it strikes a nice balance between absurd British quick wit and "heart". (In fact, I was so entertained that it inspired me to raise the bar on my own writing.) Anyway... my two cents.

On the flip side, I got a hold of the screenplay to "Knocked Up". Not because I liked the movie (I didn't, particularly), but because I was (and am) confused as to why so many of my friends thought it was hilarious.

Have any of you read the script? To me, it's ponderous... not to mention 30 pages too long. There are funny lines here and there, but nothing that points in the direction of "hit comedy". I found the situations uninventive, the relationships implausible/ poorly conceived, and, man, if there wasn't scene after scene where characters just talk AT each other. I don't get it. The stoner grows up. Haven't we seen that one, like, 500 times?

Am I alone on this one?

I can clearly see that... nobody's noticing my question(-s) and/or remark(-s) here.

Is it 'COZ of my English? :)

~ S.M. ~